Networking 101 for Law Students & Lawyers, Part Three, Specific Concerns Cont’d
Ending a conversation & moving on. While speaking with a group of three law students for several minutes recently during a women lawyers happy hour, one of them looked me in the eye, smiled, extended her hand and in a confident voice said something like “Thank you for sharing your networking advice. It’s been fun talking with you.” I laughed and acknowledged her directness as she stepped away to talk with other people. The rest of the group shook my hand and moved on as well. The law students had learned how to end a conversation so that they could meet more lawyers at the event.
Until they practice it, a lot of people are uncomfortable being this direct. For some people it at least feels better to offer an excuse to end a conversation. But many people never gather the courage to disengage from conversations at all. Instead they forgo circulating, meeting and getting to know other people even though that is often the purpose of the event or at least standard behavior during the networking time or cocktail hour at an event.
At the other extreme, some lawyers I know take a very direct route and simply say “excuse me” and leave the conversation. People have said this to me and personally I find it a little jolting. Therefore, I prefer to acknowledge the other person with whom I have been speaking. It feels polite and like something my mother would approve.
Tips for exiting a conversation.
- After you, not the other person, finish saying something –
- Smile
- Shake the other person’s hand
- Look the other person in the eye
- Say something like “It was nice to meet you. I enjoyed learning/hearing about . . . . Thank you.” You are acknowledging and thanking the other person.
- Move away confidently.
Be confident and direct. Be pleasant. Be gracious. But above all, be yourself. Therefore, if it was not nice to meet this person, follow steps 1-4, tell them you hope they enjoy the rest of the event, and then move away confidently. Say hello to start talking to someone standing alone or join a group where someone steps back to make room for you.
Exiting a conversation can feel unusual and it takes practice. But like other aspects of networking, and like public speaking, it gets easier with practice.
Networking 101 for Law Students (& Lawyers), Part Three, Specific Concerns
Last week I spoke to law students again at the University of Michigan Law School. This time the topic was event networking. A few specific concerns came up that I’d like to share here in a few posts. This advice applies to lawyers as well as law students. I coach some of my lawyer clients on similar kinds of networking challenges, even those who have been practicing law for many years.
Is it okay to ask a lawyer for her card? Short answer: Yes. Longer answer: Yes, yes, yes.
The student who asked this question was concerned about bothering the lawyer, and thought that perhaps a better thing to do would be to look up the lawyer’s contact information later on the Internet. That strategy might fail if the student forgets the lawyer’s name or doesn’t have the correct spelling. That strategy also doesn’t alter the student’s belief that he may be bothering the lawyer by contacting the lawyer later. Keep in mind that you are talking with business people. This is ordinary behavior that is anticipated at business events and even at social events. (Don’t be dissuaded by the surprising reality that many lawyers forget to carry their cards or carry just a few. They’re just not savvy yet.)
Also, keep in mind that many people are flattered if you ask for their card. Even though they may know that you are looking for a job and they have none to offer you, they can still feel flattered that you value their advice or experience. And who knows, maybe you, a law student, will have business to refer to them now or later, or perhaps you will provide value in some other way. We never know. Networking is about building relationships.
LinkedIn for Lawyers – A Few Personal Tips
Here are a few thoughts I have every time I get a LinkedIn invitation:
1. List your area of practice, rather than just associate, partner or lawyer at ABC Firm, in the “headline” space below your name. It will appear whenever your name appears. Let people know what you do as a lawyer. Make it easy for them to see and remember your practice area. This is marketing. This is developing name recognition for something specific as a lawyer. If you are afraid to list a specialty because you believe it will close the door to other potential legal work, consider how many other generic “lawyers” you are competing with in the same geographic region on LinkedIn. Are you willing to miss out on the legal work you really want to do in order to take anything that might come your way? Do you want to stand out or blend in?
2. When you send or accept a LinkedIn invitation to/from someone you know, consider the value of personalizing it with a few more sentences. Notes like that are easy, fast and free. Notes like that help you maintain relationships. At a minimum they say “I’m thinking about you personally rather than as just another name to add to my list.” To me it’s like the difference between an annual holiday card from a lawyer with (a) just a signature (and who knows who actually signed it) and (b) a signature plus a few sentences or even a single sentence as simple as “Elizabeth, I hope all is well with you” or “Elizabeth, I look forward to working with you again soon”, etc.
3. If you send a LinkedIn invitation to someone you don’t know, personalize the invitation. I don’t accept all LinkedIn invitations and I don’t accept invitations from people I don’t know who don’t even introduce themselves and say why they’d like to connect, where they saw me speak, where they met me, or if they know someone I know, etc. Imagine an in-person “networking” event where no one is allowed to speak. It’s simply a business card exchange. How would that event serve you in terms of building relationships?
Remember that networking is about building relationships. Use your relationship skills.
Time Management: Procrastination, Part I
I coach several of my lawyer clients on various time management challenges. For some, this includes procrastination. I have a few clients who are sure they are the biggest procrastinator in the world. I assure them they are not in the Top 10 but they are probably close. I believe there is an endless universe of procrastinators clustered just below the Top 10 worst ones.
You are not alone. Does that make you feel any better? Perhaps not. You know you procrastinate and you haven’t broken the cycle.
People procrastinate for thousands of different reasons. I am not convinced it matters why you procrastinate. I believe that what matters is recognizing that you have a choice. You have free will. You can choose to do now what needs to be done.
A friend recently gave me a little book by Steven Pressfield entitled “The War of Art. Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles.” Copyright 2002. http://www.stevenpressfield.com/ Pressfield, a fiction writer, wrote this book to show how he and we can identify, defeat and unlock our inner barriers to creativity.
Of procrastination, Pressfield writes:
“The most pernicious aspect of procrastination is that it can become a habit. We don’t just put off our lives today; we put them off till our deathbed.
Never forget: This very moment, we can change our lives. There never was a moment, and never will be, when we are without the power to alter our destiny. This second, we can turn the tables on Resistance.
This second, we can sit down and do our work.”
We can win the battle. This second, we can sit down and do our work.
Business Development: Clients Can Come From Unexpected Places
Yesterday I spoke as part of a panel discussion about rainmaking for lawyers. We gave advice and shared examples of the ways we and other lawyers we know have developed business.
Among other things, we talked about how clients can come from unexpected places and sources.
Although we strongly recommend focusing your efforts on your target market and your niche, realize that business can and many times does come from somewhere else. You can’t rely on this phenomena as a steady source of business, but it can supplement the results you get from your focused efforts and activities. Keep this in mind as you are out and about in your world, stay open to the possibilities and you’ll experience this phenomena. This can happen regardless of whether you are a new lawyer or a seasoned one.
Here are a few examples of unexpected business opportunities from my career and the careers of lawyers I have known as colleagues, clients, co-counsel and opposing counsel.
1. A referral from someone who was the opposing party in a piece of litigation. The opposing party was so impressed with the skill and professionalism of his opponent’s lawyer that he recommended that lawyer, not his company’s own lawyer, to another company after the lawsuit concluded.
2. Referrals from associates at out of state firms. A young lawyer who joined the law department of a corporation asked her former firm for the name of the Michigan counsel the firm used as local counsel. While at the firm she had never worked on those matters or with the Michigan counsel, but she trusted her former colleague, an associate, who gave her the name of a junior partner in the Michigan firm. The inhouse counsel ended up hiring that lawyer and the lawyer got credit for bringing in that corporate client. The young Michigan lawyer’s relationship with and service for the associate in the national firm led to this referral and origination. The inhouse counsel used the Michigan firm for all of her cases in the state and the Michigan lawyer received the origination credit for those cases.
3. Judges who leave the bench and take positions elsewhere have become clients of and referral sources for lawyers who have appeared before them and/or with whom they have become friends. This is because people, including former judges, do business with people they know, like and trust. Less well known is that former and active judges do get privately asked to recommend lawyers for matters that will not be before them. Whether active judges make such recommendations may depend on the judge and the jurisdiction.
4. Referral sources become clients themselves. Again, this is because people do business with people they know, like and trust.
5. Helping someone find a job. Many people who have done this naturally and without any ulterior motive have then found that they have a friend for life who never forgets how they helped in a time of need. The people you help in this way often do become excellent referral sources not just because they are grateful, but because they believe in you and they know you to be a high caliber individual.
6. Striking up conversations with people in the airport or on an airplane. A lawyer made a firm presentation to inhouse counsel at a major corporation as a result of offering cookies to a man who seemed to be listening to her conversation with her colleague in the airport. It turned out he was a lawyer and was inhouse counsel facing similar legal issues. He was also interested in the cookies being shared. The woman’s ease in talking with strangers and her natural interaction with her colleague made a positive impression on the inhouse counsel.
Feel free to share your stories.
Common Sense in Conference Calls: Etiquette & Other Tips
I’m no Miss Manners when it comes to etiquette, but a couple of conference calls with groups of lawyers today reminded me that “common sense isn’t common.” (Will Rogers)
1. Identity Issues. Say your name before you speak. Say it every time until you are certain that everyone recognizes your voice. “This is Elizabeth. I understand that . . . . ” “This is Elizabeth again. My question is . . . . ”
2. Identity Issues II. If you welcome someone else to the call by saying “Hi Kathy!” be thoughtful. Identify yourself. “Hi Kathy! This is Scott. How is your new year?” If “Hi Kathy!” is followed by a pause then a “Hi”, it’s a sure bet Kathy didn’t recognize your voice or wasn’t certain.
3. Breathing Space. Give others on the call room to speak. Think of it as breathing space after they speak. Listen when others are speaking and don’t jump in while they are still talking. You certainly notice when other people do that to each other. If you are actively listening, you’ll hear what they are saying and know when they are done. You’ll acknowledge what they said, add your thoughts and move the discussion forward. If you jump in the second someone finishes, you can be sure they know you weren’t listening. Instead you were thinking ahead to what you want to say.
4. Noise. Put your phone on mute when you are not speaking, especially if there is background noise at your end. Be sure to do this if you can’t break your habit of allegedly “multitasking”.
5. Connection. Call from a land line whenever possible.
6. It’s a Meeting. Treat the conference call like a meeting. Start on time. Sign in on time. Introduce yourself. Be gracious and professional with others. Assist the organizer and the note taker. At the end, if appropriate, be clear about who is going to do what by when. Thank people. End on time.
A tip for setting up conference calls: I like to use http://www.freeconferencecall.com/. I don’t have any affiliation with this company. I started using it a few years ago and it works for me. It doesn’t cost me a thing. The call-in number and my access code always remain the same. I give out the numbers when I organize calls. No reservations are necessary. There is no charge other than each caller pays whatever cost, if any, their carrier charges them for the call. Since most lawyers and groups I work with have monthly calling plans that don’t charge for individual calls, there is no separate charge for the call. I or the groups I’m part of don’t have to pay an expensive conference calling service fee.
A tip for scheduling conference calls or other events: try http://www.doodle.com/ or http://www.meetingwizard.com/. I’ve used doodle.com and it has worked well to get lawyers to provide their availability for various potential event dates. As the event organizer, you state the potential dates and poll the participants on the dates. As the participants respond, they can see who is available on which dates and you can all identify the best date more quickly. It’s easy, I promise.
Good luck with your conference calls.
A New Year & A Recurring Challenge – Time Tracking
It’s almost the close of business on the first business day of the new year and the new decade. My question for you is: Have you entered your time yet or are you behind already?
If you find yourself behind or you know you will be soon, instead of the same old same old, choose to start the year by learning to use and/or actually using time tracking software.
By making this choice, you will say yes to capturing and billing more of your time. You won’t be as likely to lose track of how long you worked on something or what you did. You will have more accurate descriptions of the legal services you provided. You will use time productively instead of struggling days later to enter it or write it coherently for your secretary to submit into the system.
As with most decisions to make a change, you will also have to say no to some things in order to make the change. Consider what you will have to say no to in order to start using the time tracking software. Think about what obstacles are likely to stop you from making this change. Decide whether you can say no to those things.
Last, figure out who and what can help you get started and help you stick with this commitment to change.
The time tracking software is pretty user friendly now. Besides helping you bill more effectively, and thus make more money, it will actually save you time and frustration. Don’t those sound like good reasons to make this change this year, right now?
2010 Planning: Goal Setting & Values Check
Last week I posted how in December I ask my clients to review their past year and acknowledge 100 of their accomplishments. In December I also ask them to write next year’s holiday letter – – as if they are looking back at the upcoming year.
When I do this exercise myself (as I had to assure one of my clients that I do), I start with a stream of consciousness or “scribbling” approach and write quickly without contemplation. I usually surprise myself with some of what I write about what happened in the upcoming year.
(A note about writing: one of my college English professors required weekly writings he called “scribbles.” They were a page or two about any thought we had related to the novel we were studying. For some reason, calling them scribbles was liberating. I still often use this approach to get started writing.)
If you haven’t set some goals yet for next year, or even thought about a New Year’s resolution, set down that burden and scribble a 2010 Holiday Letter instead.
I think you will find it is a different way to discover your values and what you really want to accomplish in the upcoming year.
Scribble and see what unfolds for you in 2010.
Your Year In Review: 100 Accomplishments
We are near year end. It is time for year end awards like Person of the Year and retrospectives like The Year’s Best and Worst [anything]. It is also a good time for the rest of us to review our year and acknowledge ourselves for what we did and who we were this year.
In December I ask my clients to give themselves a gift. I ask them to create a list of 100 things they accomplished during the year. As they make the list, they realize that they accomplished a lot more than they thought they did. And at some point in the list-making process, they usually realize it’s not always about the “doing”, it’s also about the “being”.
What does that mean? Make your list of 100 accomplishments and you’ll find out.
You’ll probably start with easy metrics related to work. At some point you will start thinking about all of the things you did in your personal life as well. Eventually you will get to more of who you were — perhaps how you remained resilient, persevered, asserted yourself , met new people, were a friend or deepened relationships.
I know this is a hard assignment for people who were raised not to brag about themselves. If this sounds familiar, ask yourself what it is to brag.
You don’t have to share your year end list with anyone. But do take the time and acknowledge yourself for what you did and who you were in 2009. A great coach I know calls this “savoring your year.”
Give yourself this gift. Notice what happens when you do.
Job Searches & Business Development Advice: George Clooney & Lawyers
No, this post isn’t actually about George Clooney, but it is about job search and business development advice that holds true for actors as well as lawyers.
Over the weekend I heard a brief interview with a local actress who has a bit part in George Clooney’s new movie, Up In The Air. Apparently she plays an airline ticket agent with a scene with Mr. Clooney. Part of the movie was filmed in the Detroit Metro Airport. When asked what advice she would give to aspiring actors and actresses who want to be in such movies, she said “Put yourself out there, meet people, network.”
So there you have it. Whether you are an aspiring actor or a lawyer trying to develop more business or get a new job, the advice remains the same: extend yourself, meet people and build relationships.